The postman knows the unfashionable truth…

postmanThe postman must think I suffer from a several personality’s disorder. It appears that every time I am having one of these days, the post man will appear-

“Husband PJ’” day..I have my husband’s pyjamas on at 11 o’clock on a weekday and vacuuming house wildly. My toddler is still not dressed.He is running around the house butt naked with a dustpan and broom.

“Lady of the night” day…. I have a way too short nightie on, panda eyes and the house looks like a brothel.

“Beauty therapy” day… I am in the shower with a facemask on and the mailman is knocking impatiently.

“Dress up” day… I have decided to try a new look but not half-heartedly. For instance 1950’s housewife without the immaculate kitchen. I may be looking immaculate which means the house will be looking rather dishevelled.

“Supermodel footwear” day… I am breaking in new high heels however I am wearing it with casual attire. This day usually includes pretend European catwalking with loud fashion show music playing (and possible fantasising about being a supermodel at 30).

The day the postman arrives to “immaculate x3 – house, child and I” will most likely never happen. I asked the postman once “have you ever been greeted by a woman in a face mask and a naked child before today?” The response without any hesitation “Oh yes, I have seen everything before”. I could only wonder what other women do in their seemingly normal homes…….

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